13. Attitude = Self-Esteem

Self-Esteem is All about Attitude

“Self-esteem” as depicted by the word itself, refers to one’s views about himself and his place in the whole scheme that is life.

Self-esteem is closely related to the concepts of self-worth and competence. Self-worth is all about seeing oneself in the whole context of reality, keeping in mind the basic human values. Competence refers to one’s conviction on the belief that he can achieve things. These two concepts always go hand-in-hand with each other to be able to develop a healthy sense of self-esteem. A sense of worthiness prevents competence from becoming arrogance by reminding the person of the basic human values that should be achieved. Competence prevents worthiness become narcissism by reminding the person that good feelings are earned and not explicitly given.

Self-esteem is all about attitude. It is an attitude towards seeing oneself, one’s potentials and the challenge of actualizing these potentials.

Oneself

Having a good attitude towards oneself is the basic foundation of a healthy self-esteem. One must have the confidence to be able to perform and this is founded through a good view of oneself.

People should always remember that everybody is different. Being different isn’t necessarily bad, if one finds the uniqueness in himself. Everybody has a unique set of traits that sets him apart from the rest of the world. Low self-esteem can result from having a negative view of this uniqueness. This can later be followed by envy of people who are better in certain things. “Is there something wrong with me?” “Why did I lose?” These are some questions that result from self-doubting.

Low self-esteem can lead to underachieving. It is a condition wherein a person’s performance falls short of his potential. The potential of underachievers are then put into waste. Underachievers tend to ultimately stop trying because of the belief that they are not capable of doing things. This can be a very dangerous situation since it will affect a person’s mental, physical, social and spiritual conditions.

Self-acceptance and self-appreciation are the keys towards building self-esteem. A person needs to be able to see his qualities and accept himself for who he is. He takes into consideration his strengths and weaknesses and builds on his strengths and overcomes his weaknesses. A chubby person doesn’t have to resort to diets which would eventually be detrimental to his health. A kid should not take drastic measures in reviewing for a test just to get a high score. A single aspect of one’s life should not be equated to his total attributes as a person.

The Self in the Context of the World

A positive attitude towards oneself is usually bugged by the things around the person. Low self-esteem is usually influenced by the wrong attitude of comparing oneself with other persons. Envy, as said earlier, leads to negative thoughts of one and can result to low self-esteem.

There’s nothing wrong with idolizing other people for their abilities and their success, however, this should be done under a positive light. Putting yourself down because of others is not a healthy thing to do. Trying to become someone else is neither a good sign of finding self-worth and confidence.

The only standard that is worthy of being recognized is the standard that one sets upon himself. The world is full of different opinions and views but at the end of the day, the most important thing is that the heart is followed and happiness is achieved because of the beauty that is recognized from within.

Finding one’s meaning in the context of the world maybe a difficult and challenging task. The journey should start from within one’s soul. You must always remember that you were put in this world for a reason. Self-esteem can be found in one’s purpose in this world. Forgive yourself if you have fallen short of your expectations and try to stand up as a better person.

Low self-esteem can eventually crush the totality of a person. Developing a good sense of the self and finding one’s own place in the whole scheme of things can truly help in having a healthy self-esteem.